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Sex, marriage and love

June 15, 2013

1 Corinthians 7:1-7
(part of a series of church camp messages, see earlier post)

A reminder of the distinctiveness of Christian marriage: marriage is an invitation to die to my self. I have been bought with a price; I am no longer my own, and am to glorify God with my body. The paradigm shift is now how I should please God.  I am to take the mind of Christ, who took on the form of a servant, in His other-centeredness. In marriage, then, I exist for service to John for his godliness.The ultimate expression of humility is love, and love is servant-heartedness- humility and love, two sides of the coin? And my body is not exempt.

Marriage is a spiritual battlefield, and the bed no less. There is a deep link in spirituality and sexuality – and in this close intimacy, satan will tempt us. Comparing the Christian and the Corinthian mindset in marriage, the former transforms attitudes in giving vs taking. My body is no longer mine to withhold or control, and I can not make my spouse beg for what is rightfully his. Gender differences are also understood- the male libido is different from the female, being visually driven and compartmentalised. It is also given to a quick spike and dive. The female, on the other hand, has her mind, soul and body tightly integrated. Actions throughout the day by her husband, such as washing the dishes and changing nappies, are interpreted by her as signs of love and encourages her. Also, an argument at 7pm is still remembered by her at 11pm, as opposed to her husband, who would have completely forgotten it when he wants to make love. Contrasting his quick spike and dive to hers which is slow to rise and takes time to settle, the loving husband then takes the time after he has fulfilled his pleasure, to give her hers. The loving christian couple also change their frequency as much as is necessary to fulfill both spouses. One, for example, may nightly wrap a towel around himself and announce his availability.

(I must emphasise that these are all notes from the message.)

Finally, there is no such thing as a celibate marriage in 1 Cor 7. They may leave off making love for a time, but there must be a specific reason, it must be mutual, and it must end.  Given that marriage is a battlefield, we must pray in anything and everything.

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